A small lake over an abyss...

Is it ennui this morning? I'm not so sure. My mind won't allow sleep but it also won't allow a happiness. Similar actually to the day outside, with its moments of mild sunshine that slip back into gray moments after they've arrived.
No matter.

For Jobs No Money....

Small keys to everyday existence like a fat nickel or thin dime
Hide quarters in exchange for peace and strife of mind
Peace this peace that
Every time someone wants a piece I have to grab my piece
3000 Andres and not a drop to drink
Between here and reality you fill the blank
Is it your hands or others that hand you your thanks
Be to all mind matters that matter - mine
I and I with eyes of planets in pairs and duos
hearts with near eclipses and collisions
Monica

To apologize...

I'm clinging, clinging as in a fish in a net, or an animal trapped in a hole, to the gnarled roots and strings that bind me. Fire burns brightest when it first flares up. I apologize and in doing so admitted guilt. The second fire blew into my face. Work is less about my profession and more about my ego.

Success In Encounters...

Hexagram 47 - K'un - Exhaustion/Oppression

The love of my life has spurned me once again. Of an age where I no longer can joke about my intentions, I realize that I can't fight it, and I respond with a white flag that hopefully wasn't too negative. I thought of defiance - in multiple ways. No, fuck no, I'm not going to let you go. Then, Oh, why? It hurts so much! But no, the classic, because I love her I have to let her go scenario. Lame how cliche life is.

La Cocaina...

Went to Grain and Gristle with my friends on Saturday night before a little hop skip and a jump down to Mississippi studios to see Tennis. The beautiful and bored were out in droves and I found myself dancing alone to "Marathon" and hooting into the void after songs while the disinterested checked each other out. There was a moment of bliss followed by a long walk home.

To Change A Life...

Dreaming of shattered wooden planks
but glide glide glide
there's a softness today in the air
with the mist of winter and the early week

The sun only shines in my skin...

When all is built to give you happiness
what does it mean when you can't smile?

When simple maya knows the space between electrons
how can you ever close doors?